I Also Like Butter

A few days ago I mentioned a Top Secret Project that was underway and would be revealed on January 30^th. Well that’s today! And what’s so special about today? It’s National Croissant Day of course! You can’t even imagine how happy it makes me that I can now say that I’ve made croissants and that my croissants arre edible. Not only are they edible, they’re actually pretty decent. It’s not Paris in my kitchen and it never will be, but I made croissants and they aren’t awful! You’re probably wondering why a nincompoop like me would even attempt to make croissants, (I could easily have celebrated National Croissant Day with a bakery purchase). Rightly so since I’m the same person who routinely forgets to put yeast in bread and then can’t figure out why it didn’t rise.

Well, it all began way back in November when I saw Ivonne of Cream Puffs in Venice and Lis of La Mia Cucina collaborate to make pretzels from the same recipe and then post about it on the same day. I asked them if I could join in on their next project and they graciously agreed. So in December, the three of us, along with Peabody of Culinary Concoctions by Peabody and Helen of Tartelette baked biscotti from a Dorie Greenspan recipe. This was my first Dorie recipe and I’ve been hooked ever since!

Sometime after the biscotti project was over, Lis informed us that, (like it or not) this would be a monthly event. And that’s when I opened my big mouth and suggested that we make croissants next. I made this suggestion based not on any skills I possess, but rather on my uncompromising love of butter. I have never made croissants or puff pastry or any kind of complex pastry. I draw the line at pie dough and it’s taken me a long time to become comfortable with that. So why on earth did I think I could tackle croissants? Possibly because I have an unrealistic belief that I’m Superwoman… Then I received the recipe from Ivonne and it was FIVE pages long and I started feeling like croissants might be my kryptonite. As I skimmed over the recipe I noted that not only was it FIVE pages long, but that it would be a THREE day long project. What on earth had I gotten myself into? Well, at least I wouldn’t be alone. In addition to Ivonne, Lis, Peabody and Helen, Veron of Veronica’s Test Kitchen and Quellia of All Things Edible would also be joining in.

For three days I had no clue what I was doing. I was shocked when the dough wouldn’t mix in my mixer and I had to knead it by hand. I was baffled when it didn’t rise like it should have. I was then astonished when, after shaping, (misshaping?) my croissants the dough rose to alarming heights and resembled the Michelin man. I was lost as I foolishly tried to transfer risen croissants from the butter tray to a clean one, (they didn’t appreciate that). And then I danced around the kitchen like a lunatic, trying to figure out how many trays it would take to bake these suckers. The recipe said one tray would do it, but I ended up using three. What is this? A kitchen made for ants? In the end though, after three days of hoping against all odds that I could bake croissants, I actually did it. And you can too, but I don’t suggest it. If you’ve never made croissants, you might want to continue enjoying them in blissful ignorance. You don’t want to know how much butter goes into them, (I thought I knew, I then had to multiply that number). But they’re soo-oh-oooo good! Like all baking experiences, I’ve learned a few things, (aside from the butter content of a croissant): I’ve learned that I can’t roll dough out into a rectangle. I can’t cut in a straight line. I have difficulty following instructions, (I may have already known that...) and I can’t refuse a challenge or a hot croissant right out of the oven, even though I know how much butter is in there. Correction: I can’t refuse THREE hot croissants right out of the oven. And yes, I realize they’re absolutely enormous. If I die from a heart attack, I want a picture of a croissant and the caption “I died happy” on my tombstone.

Perhaps the only thing better than a fresh croissant is a fresh croissant dipped in rich hot chocolate, for breakfast. When I lived in France I ate it every morning and usually every afternoon too, (so that’s where those 20lbs came from…). The croissant soaks up the hot chocolate and if you don’t bring it to your lips quickly you’ll loose it. Not to worry though, a few sips later you’ll find it again at the bottom of your mug and it will be as good as ever.

I must say though, it will be a long time before I ever go to the trouble of making croissants again. Yes, they were delicious and I was so proud of myself for making them, but come on! They took three days! The recipe was 5 pages long! I ate a few pounds of butter! They’re dangerous.

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Croissants + Butter + Blogging Event + Baking + National Croissant Day