November 08, 2006
An Ode To the Kitchen Fairy
It was blog writing time and all through the house,
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.
My cat was curled up, asleep in her chair,
As I tried desperately to think of something to share.
The dishes were done so I started this thread,
While visions of failed dinner danced in my head.
Sitting in the lazyboy with the computer on my lap,
No matter how I wrote it, tonight’s cooking was crap.
When out in the kitchen there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my chair to see what was the matter.
Away to the kitchen I flew like a flash,
And slid into the counter with a bang and a crash.
The bruise on my thigh was just starting to show,
As I let out a Homer Simpson like D’oh!
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a Kitchen Fairy, there was nothing to fear.
With silver wings, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment this wasn’t a trick.
To get me inspired is why she came,
And summoned some help by calling out names!
"Now Wilbur! Now, Ames! Now, Simon and Monty!
On, Jacob! On, Jordan! Let’s pour some chianti!
Bring out the wine and top up the glass,
We’ll work and we’ll work and we’ll help this young lass!"
Dinner may have been salty and dessert a bit dry,
What matters the most is you gave it a try.
Sometimes things go wrong, it might happen to you,
But all is not lost if you learn something new.
With a twinkle in her eye she said ‘Now you know,
When pouring the soy sauce, be sure to go slow.
And as for puff pastry, your oven runs hot
So times in a recipe may be for naught.’
Of course she was right, it was no big deal,
I know for a fact I can cook a good meal.
Pointing to the cookbooks I said ‘Let’s go!’
Feeling a bit daring I was going to make dough.
Her eyes-how they twinkled! Her dimples how merry!
Her cheeks were like roses, her nose like a cherry!
Her droll little mouth was curled up like my cat,
Because dough leads to bread and she’s an expert at that.
A jar of yeast was held out in her hand,
She knew this would happen, she had it all planned.
Then to the pantry to pick up some flour
This bread would turn out, I had Fairy power!
But what recipe should I use? Over that I debated,
Then selected my Mom’s as it was star-rated.
Milk, sugar, water, yeast and some lard,
Two types of flour, this wasn’t so hard!
I mixed and I added, I mixed and I kneaded,
Allowed it to proof and this I repeated.
I heated the oven and greased up some pans,
This is the bread that would win me some fans.
The sweet scent of bread was all I could smell,
But I was so anxious and my Fairy could tell.
With a wink of her eye and a twist of her head,
I knew that at last I’d succeeded with bread.
She spoke not a word, but pulled out her wand,
With the sureness and certainty of a seasoned gourmand.
And out of the oven came my amazing creation,
It was golden and perfect, and oh! the elation!
Then away from the kitchen my Fairy did go,
Out of the warmth and into the snow.
But I heard her exclaim, as she flew out of sight,
"Happy Bread Baking to all, and to all a good-night!"
In a pan heat: 1.5 c milk, 1.5 tbsp lard, 1.5 tsp salt, ¼ c sugar, cool to lukewarm.
In a bowl put ½ c lukewarm water. Stir in ¾ tsp sugar. Sprinkle on ¾ tbsp yeast. Let stand 10min.
Into a very large bowl, pour 1st mixture and beat in 1.5 c whole wheat flour. Beat in 2nd mixture. Beat in 1 more c whole wheat flour. Gradually add 2 3/8 c white flour (or a combination of white and rye flour) at first stirring in with a wooden spoon and then kneading by hand. Knead at least 15min or until dough is soft and elastic and hands come clean.
Set to rise in a greased bowl covered in a warm place until doubled in bulk (1 - ½ hours). Punch down. Let stand 10min.
Grease a loaf pans.
Roll dough into a rectangle, then with fingers roll up jelly roll fashion. Flatten edges. Tuck in seams. Place in pan.
Cover and set to rise in a warm place about 1 hour or until doubled in bulk.
Bake at 375°F for 10min and then at 350°F for 25min.
Remove from pan, butter top, let cool.
Food + Baking + Bread + Recipe